Mom

Originally written on October 28, 2005

“Ok beta, I’ll speak to you tomorrow...’ thus spake my mom…Mom, who was always there -like a pillar of strength for my sister and me. Mom, who was the driving force behind my father, and the silent decision maker of our home.

I remember with clear precision - just like it was yesterday- when Mom had coached me for one of the many English Elocution contests held in my school, and how she had rejoiced when I had won. She was always there- sitting in the fist row of parents- always cheering me on, whether I was Sleeping Beauty or as inconspicuous as one of the many choirgirls in senior school. Dad might not be able to make it to my prize giving ceremonies, but Mom was always there- with a smile for the teachers at Tea held afterwards. She never uttered a single word of protest as she sat up half the nights embroidering my Sampler for me, as I feverishly studied up World Wars. When it was time for the all-important Board exams, she would lie to my Dad, tell him that I was studying, when I had actually slept off with exhaustion. Even though we fought (rather, disagreed) often (on issues as inane as letting me go out alone for my friend’s birthday treat), I adored her, and I secretly stole a picture of her from her wedding album, where she looked as lovely as a princess, glowing with love and confidence. She healed bruised egos when my best friend refused to shower me with the much-wanted attention, and kissed away my sister’s tears when she fell down and hurt her head. The glow on her face belied the pride in her when I ran to her showing yet another article written by me published in the daily newspaper. She was ecstatic when I won awards and discreetly made them the subject of the next teatime conversation with friends.

Once I graduated from school, mom became more of a friend than a parent, as she listened to accounts of favouritist professors and hid more than a bunch of flowers delivered home by some love struck boy. She egged me on as I pursued multiple courses, fought with my dad to buy me a two-wheeler, and wept solitary tears when I had to leave home for post graduation. She tried to hide her excitement and depression over the miles of ether as she called me when I was away from home, and guessed correctly whether I was eating on time, and if I needed money.

I still remember the day I was picked for my first ever job, on the first day of placement. She had told me that money wasn’t important, it was following my dreams that were paramount, and so, when I landed with a plum, but not so lucrative job in Advertising, she was the one who told me that I should never lose sight of my dream.

At weddings, the pride in her was evident as she went around introducing me to fat aunties and balding uncles, who pulled my cheeks as if I was still a 5 year old, showing off the blue saree I had bought her with my first salary. Before such events, while we were dressing, she would look at our reflection in the mirror, and see a younger version of herself, and would sadly exclaim that all her beauty had faded.

Much later, she was the one who silently approved of my then boyfriend (while my dad chattered nineteen to the dozen), and who critically examined him for any faults. Satisfied when she didn’t find any, she proceeded to fall in love with him as if he was the son she never had.

She shopped with magical fervour for my wedding, making tedious to-do lists in her neat little handwriting, balancing between my dad’s extravaganzas and indulging herself only so much as to satisfy every little whim I fancied. When I set up my own house, she thought of everything I might need, and bought me little knick-knacks that only an experienced homemaker can foresee.

Looking back, I think I now realize why people thank their mom and dad while on stage, receiving awards. I could have waited to thank my mom till I received some award, at a socially appropriate setting, where a bunch of people would have heard this and forgotten it…but I wish to thank her, right now, right this moment.

Mom, how could I not have won those Elocution contests, because it was you who taught me all the nuances…Mom, you are still as beautiful as the day you married dad and your beauty will never fade in our eyes, Mom, you are still cook the best kheer and alu-puri in the world, Mom, your being there will always be more than everyone else combined…simply put- Mom, I love you.

Thank you for being there.